â€å“that Donã¢â‚¬â„¢t Get Him Back Again

The Bench Hunks – 1 Jomari: Most Desirable Man of the Hour - CONVERSATIONS with Ricky Lo

Nobody sells underwear the way Jomari Yllana does. As a Bench Underwear model, Jomari has been selling them by the hundreds of thousands, making that brand the No. 1 in the market today, imitated but never equalled. You see Jomari far-bigger-than-life, as tall as a 12-storey building, in that Bench advertisement, clad only in his underwear, and your first impulse is to buy the same underwear, isn’t it?

But this Sunday, Jomari will be talking about something more than his underwear. The usually reticent Jomari is opening up on his most immediate concern — that is, his break-up with wife Aiko Melendez (newly-elected Councilor of the First District of Quezon City).

Married only last year in a combined civil-church ceremony, almost a year after Aiko gave birth to their first child, Andres Raphael (turning two years old in September), the couple finally made a clean breast of everything after months and months of tabloid and movie-column speculations about the state of their union, with all sorts of what-might-have-beens being spread in the air.

Where did Aiko and Jomari go wrong? Are there any "third parties" involved? Has politics anything to do with the split-up? Is their marriage beyond repair, beyond rescue? Where do they go from here?

Jomari answers all these — and more.

(Note: Jomari is the first Bench Hunk to be put on the spot by Conversations, to be followed by Diether Ocampo two Sundays from now and then by Borgy Marcos Manotoc who, like Jomari, will open their hearts and bare their souls for all of us to probe and pry into. Stay tuned.)

Are you prayerful?

"Oh, yes, I am. I pray even more to thank God for all the blessings He’s giving me. I pray not to ask for anything but to thank God for something good that comes to me or that happens in my life."

How do you pray?

"Direct to God. Sometimes, I ask the help of my late father (Col. Andres Yllana who died last April 7 after having been confined to a wheelchair due to a stroke). I go to his grave at the Himlayang Pilipino; he’s buried beside his mom and dad."

Did you talk a lot with your Dad when he was alive?

"I did. All of us did. More so a few days before he slipped into a coma. After dinner, each of us would spend an hour in private with Dad and tell him everything that we wanted to tell him, or ask him everything that we wanted to ask. Marami akong ibinulong at ibinilin sa kanya."

Such as what?

"I asked him to help me be strong for my brothers, especially for my Mom. I have my weak side but I try not to show it to my family. Ayokong mahirapan sila. I told my Dad all about my fears; secret naming dalawa ’yon. After he died, ‘yung mga kinatatakutan ko isa-isang nangyayari." (Note: Jomari is the fourth among five brothers, coming after Anjo, a topnotcher Councilor of Parañaque City; Robbie; and Polly; and before Ryan. Their father was a brother of Monina Yllana, one-time Miss Philippines; and their mom, Vicky Garchitorena, is the cousin of Sandiganbayan Justice Francis Garchitorena whose wife is also named Vicky and ’60s model Gilda Garchitorena.)

I guess now that you’re having problems with your marriage, you make more frequent trips to Himlayang Pilipino.

"I go there by myself, not with the driver who used to go with me. I’m not comfortable with other people around; gusto ko kaming dalawa lang ng Daddy. But lately, I seldom go there kasi baka iyakan ko lang siya. I don’t want him to feel sorry for me. Instead, I talk to his room at home (in Parañaque). Walang nagalaw sa room niya until now, so I could feel his presence there. I know he’s still there."

Don’t you confide in your Mom or your brothers?

"I don’t. I don’t want to burden them with my problems. At least si Daddy, nandoon na siya. He’s nearer to God so I presume that he can help me relay my message to God faster. Each of us brothers looks at Dad in a different way. Anjo was like a dad to my Dad while my brothers look as Dad as really a Daddy. Ako naman, I look at Dad as a mirror of myself. Kung ano siya, ’yon ako. When I had problems, it was him that I ran to."

Even when he was already invalid (for more than 10 years)?

"Yeah. He was my shock absorber. We understood each other perfectly. Whatever he’d say, naiintindihan ko kaagad dahil pareho kami ng ugali. So when I ran to him, mayroon kaagad akong solution to my problems."

Now that your Dad isn’t around, maybe you feel helpless, don’t you?

"Sort of. You know, I feel that I grew up sooner than I expected. Dad helped me, all of us brothers, to mature faster. Nagpaalam siyang confident in the thought that he had prepared us to face life squarely."

When you said you grew up sooner than you expected, did you mean that you missed out on something?

"On the contrary, I enjoyed my younger and teenage years; nagsawa din naman ako." (Adding with a laugh and a blush) "Maaga akong lumandi." (More laughter)

At what age did you start, well, you know...?

"Even before I joined Guwapings (The early ’90s teen triumvirate heartthrobs also including Mark Anthony Fernandez and Eric Fructuoso — RFL)... even before I entered showbiz. Laman na ako ng Makati noon. I was ahead of my peers, more advanced than my brothers, including Kuya Anjo who also matured fast in his own way. Iba naman ang hinarap niya — responsibility. Because our Dad got sick, Anjo became the head of our family because he’s the eldest child. Ako, more of adventure. So at an early age, 12 pa lang ako, laman na ako ng mga disco sa Makati."

Oh, so you must have lost your innocence very early! At a disco joint, I suppose.

"Nakakahiya sabihin, pero batam-bata pa ako noon.

I was very young."

Who’s the lucky girl (or "corruptor" of innocence)? Somebody older?

"Much older."

Somebody you met — or who picked you up — at the disco?

"No. I met her through a friend."

How did it happen?

"It happened fast. I went to her house and... it just happened! ‘Yon na ’yon."

Was she a celebrity?

"I don’t think so. But she wasn’t married. I haven’t seen her since then. I guess she’s now abroad."

Being an early starter, would you say that you prematurely "committed" marriage — and so did Aiko (at 25 one year Jomari’s senior)?

"Well, ganito ’yon: Aiko wanted to have a baby and I also wanted to have a baby. One time, we visited Dad at the hospital during one of his confinements. That was in late 1998. Dad suffered from complications that required long hospitalization. He thought he was going na. He told us, ‘Bigyan n’yo na ako ng apo. That’s the only thing I haven’t experienced — being a lolo.’ And it happened. Aiko got pregnant."

That fast!?! How did it happen?

(Reluctantly)

"I still remember when it happened — in the afternoon of New Year’s Day 1999, at our home in Parañaque. Doon na-conceive si Andre. We were already living together at that time, at the Garden Island Condo in Quezon City (near Regal Films). After Aiko gave birth, we moved to my townhouse in Filinvest Homes in Quezon City. Aiko found the place too cramped, so we decided to move to her house in Tivoli Homes (also in Quezon City) where we have been staying until last week when I moved out."

Did staying with your in-laws (Aiko’s mother and stepfather and step-siblings) affect your marriage in any way?

"I didn’t have any problems with Aiko’s mom, not even with her stepfather at sa mga kapatid niya. As in wala talaga."

So what could have caused your separation? Another woman... Ara Mina (according to rumors)?

"It’s not true that there was ever anything between Ara Mina (his co-star in the GMA sitcom Kiss Muna) and me." (Adding jokingly) "Kung girlfriend ko si Ara Mina, e, di para ko na ring hinahalikan si Chuck Mathay (newly-elected Congressman of the First District of Quezon City, Ara’s biological father)."

Why naman?

(Still in light mood) "Di ba magkamukhang-magkamukha sila?"

Wasn’t there any, well, unusual fondness between you and Ara?

"Friends lang talaga kami. Even when we were doing two movies (Banatan and Sagad sa Init), there was no spark. Purely trabaho lang talaga."

So what could have caused the break-up?

"You know, I still remember what Fr. Soc Villegas said in his homily during our wedding. ‘You know, Aiko and Jomari, in every marriage God should always be the center.’ It’s just so sad to say that in the case of Aiko and me, we didn’t put God in the center of our marriage; ang naging sentro tsismis at intriga."

Having been in showbiz since you both were young, aren’t you used to intrigues and gossip?

"Ako,

conditioned na sa intrigues and gossip. If we were to weigh the gossips about Aiko and about me, mas mabigat ‘yung mga gossips about her. Ako, I’m rumored to be babaero, to have a socialite as regular date and the boyfriend of Ara Mina. All false. Si Aiko naman, na-rumor na nagdra-drugs at kung anu-ano pa. I never believed those rumors. I trust my wife."

Have you ever been unfaithful (since you and Aiko got married)?

(With a straight face)

"No!"

Meaning, you’ve never gone to bed with any other woman?

(Looking at you straight in the eye)

"Never!"

Do you love Aiko?

(Sadness crossing his eyes)

"I love her even more now, much more than ever."

So what could have caused your break-up?

"She wanted some space. There’s no third party on my part, neither is there any third party on her part."

Baka naman

you both just fell out of love?

"I don’t think so. I swear that I’ll never love anybody as much as I love Aiko."

How long have you been living apart?

"More than two weeks already."

So Aiko and Andre remain in her Tivoli house. And where are you staying?

"I went back to our house in Parañaque ... Nakikitira ako sa Nanay ko."

Don’t you and Aiko have open communication lines? Don’t you openly discuss your problems ... thresh things out?

"I don’t let problems affect me. Yes, we do discuss things."

O baka naman

you have doubts about each other?

"Not on my part. Maybe siya mayroon. I don’t know. Maybe she lets the tsismis affect her. Baka nagpapadala siya sa mga intriga."

What do you think is the tsismis that affected Aiko the most?

(Heaving a sigh)

"It’s a long story ... But I can’t blame her. She’s a product of showbiz."

Just like you.

"But not as much as Aiko. Si Aiko kasi, as early as four years old, showbiz na ‘yan. I started in showbiz when I was about 10 (as the young Richard Gomez in Hihintayin Kita sa Langit). Even if I know Aiko inside-out, there are a few questions about her na hindi ko nasagot."

Like what?

"Like ... ‘Bakit ka ba ganyan?’ I sort of got a partial answer when I analyzed things after she asked for ‘some space’. That’s all she wanted — space."

Haven’t you settled the issues?

"Well, we were not able to settle the issues about me but the issues about her, hindi namin pinatulan."

Why?

"I got tired of the issues about and against me. I was tired of the confrontations. It became a routine. It seemed that Aiko believed the tsismis and what other people told her more than she believed me."

Was it the first time you broke up?

"No. Pinalayas na niya ako noon."

When was that?

"Before the start of the (recent election) campaign."

Could she have gotten bored because she was a stay-home mom and you were always out ... working?

"I don’t think so. She was already busy at that time preparing for the campaign. I forgot now why she drove me away. Basta, pinalayas niya ako."

Did her entry into politics adversely affect your marriage?

"On the contrary, I think it strengthened our marriage pa nga. When she drove me away, I stayed with my Mom in Parañaque. I also accompanied Anjo in his rallies (Anjo finished No. 1 in the race for councilors in Parañaque City. — RFL). While standing in front of the crowd, it dawned on me that I should be campaigning more for my wife than for my brother. Dapat ginagawa ko ’yon for Aiko and not for Anjo. So I called her up right away and told her, ‘Let’s fix this up.’ I swallowed my pride. I went home that same day and I campaigned for her. I was gone for only more than one week."

How many times did you campaign for Aiko?

"Mga

eight to nine times."

You don’t look shattered. You look and act as if everything’s okay. I bet you know how to carry a problem with a flourish.

"A lot of people tell me that, maybe because they can’t see what’s inside me. I would arrive on the set of Kiss Muna and my co-stars would tell me, like Elizabeth Oropesa, ‘Jomari, ang guwapo-guwapo mo ngayon. Mas guwapo ka ngayon. Ano’ng nangyari sa ‘yo?’ Si Klaudia (Koronel) naman would tease me, ‘O, Jomari, wala na kayo ni Aiko. Puede na ba tayo?’ I guess they’re just trying to cheer me up."

Pero

shattered ka nga ba talaga?

"Very! But I’m not bothered by my conscience because as far as I know and remember, walang hiningi sa akin si Aiko na hindi ko binigay, big or small, material or not. But I haven’t closed my door; bukas pa rin sa kanya ang pintuan ko. Aiko and Andre are still my inspirations in life up to now. I’m working hard for them. As I’ve said, mas mahal ko si Aiko ngayon kaysa noong magkasama kami. Wala akong galit sa kanya."

What about your being a sex symbol (especially since you’re very sexy and you look very desirable in the Bench underwear giant billboards)? Did it perhaps make Aiko feel insecure because she might — she could! — lose you to another woman (what with all those women fantasizing over and lusting for you)?

"It does put me in a tricky situation. Look, nagkakandakuba ako sa kata-trabaho, sometimes parading before an audience only in my briefs, all for them, para lang mabigay ko ang luho ng pamilya ko. I’m doing everything for them. Sana Aiko would look at it as work and not a kind of flirting."

How do you feel with all those eyes focused on your, ehem, crotch?

"I try my best to look relaxed and confident and cool, and not at all affected by all those eyes on me."

You must be mighty proud of your body.

(Breaking into embarrassed smile)

"Acting lang ’yan."

What part of your body are you proud of?

(Thinking long and hard)

"My feet. That part of my body is Aiko’s favorite. My feet. That’s why I take good care of my feet because they are Aiko’s favorite. When she was infanticipating, I would wake up in the morning to find my toenails painted in multi-color. Si Aiko ang nagpipinta n’un. I’d go to my shooting in slippers and my co-workers would stare at my colored toenails with amusement. Nagtataka sila. Pinaglilihan ni Aiko ang mga paa ko. Sometimes when I got home, she’d even kiss my feet as soon as I took off my shoes. Ganoon niya kamahal ang paa ko."

What part naman of Aiko’s body is your favorite?

"Her face. When I wake up, always ahead of Aiko, in the morning, I’d look at her face. She looked so lovely fast asleep. Now when I wake up in Parañaque, the first thing that greets my eyes is a pillow. I even miss Aiko’s smell. I love that smell! Iba ang amoy ng kama ko ngayon — amoy Mommy ko!"

Are you civil to each other, especially since you have to visit your kid?

"Oh, yes, we are. No problem. Here and now, I promise Aiko and my son that habang buhay ako, hindi sila maghihirap, hindi ko sila pababayaan, not even if Aiko finds another man. I have big business plans, something dealing with racing, but I’m not yet in a position to reveal the details."

How long have you been a Bench model?

"Since 1993, since I was 16."

How do you maintain your sexy body?

"My old instructor, a terror, is back with me. He won’t stop until he is satisfied with the way I’m working out. Diet? I don’t. I eat anything. Okay naman ang metabolism ko, e. Sleep? No problem. I can sleep anywhere, anytime."

If you go to your father’s grave now, what would you ask or tell him?

"I won’t ask or tell him anything. All I want is to see him, even for a split second, standing on his feet and not sitting on a wheelchair. Just that."

wiserocklairling1980.blogspot.com

Source: https://www.philstar.com/entertainment/2001/06/10/97645/bench-hunks-1-jomari-most-desirable-man-hour-conversations-ricky-lo